Here I sit 2 am Thursday August 22nd.  Exactly 9 days from my baby boys 1st birthday.  Nothing I am physically or mentally capable of doing other than loving this little guy.  The complete and utter feeling of helplessness.  For those of you who are unaware, my son, Grayson Douglas Irwin, was diagnosed with t-cell ALL Leukemia less than 24 hours ago.  A diagnosis that has turned our little family upside down.

Grayson is in God’s hands at this point and out of my own selfish will and desire that scares me.  With how incredibly rough the night has been for G to get any sleep I worry that tomorrow he will not start off at full strength.  With some stronger medicine in his system and oxygen flowing into his nose to keep O2 sats up I hope that he is able to get a more peaceful nights rest.

The outpouring of love that we have received from everyone is so greatly appreciated.  I apologize now if I have not responded to you. Know that I did receive your message and that I greatly appreciate it, however, with processing everything a response has come short on my list of priorities though.

I am sad that I missed G’s stint of play this evening because I could have used that, however, the time away with my cousin Paige to simply get dinner and some necessities was much needed.  Janelle is away for the night to get a solid night sleep (hopefully) and that leaves me on duty.

Janelle and I have talked at length and we both know that there is little that we can physically do to help Grayson with anything other than support and love, however, Katelyn remains a great concern and priority.  She is currently with “Aunt” Shell Hart and I can not wait to see her.  I fear her response to “Bubba’s” current situation/appearance as he has 2 IV lines, O2 sat cable, EKG leads and an oxygen mask in place not to mention the fact of the bloating in his body from the IV fluid they have him on to try to keep his system flushed and kidneys working properly.  We love her and miss her so much and it is very difficult having our family torn apart.  

I needed a laugh tonight and this made me chuckle out loud so I figured I would share it!  I have no idea what restaurant this was at but it sure does make me smile.  

Thank you all again for your love and support.  We are looking at 5 weeks in Gainesville for continuous treatment and then weekly treatments after that for 3 years with whatever follows after that.  It is going to be a trying road and your prayers will never be unwanted.